昨晚，又是一个很讽刺的夜晚。不知道该高兴还是替自己悲哀。。。最后，还是忍不住地哭了。

反反复复，也习惯了。才发现，原来自己还是那么地放不开。整整一年多了，我。。。还爱你。好几次，有一种莫名的冲动，很想告诉他心里的感觉，但，还是没有拿出勇气来。很想很想念你带给我的回忆，即使是回忆，无论开心的，伤心的。。。都很怀念。还以为时间可能可以治疗那道曾经被你留下的伤痕，潇洒地走出你的世界。但最后，你还是回到了我的世界。有时，我们以为可以放弃的，就往往是你最刻苦铭心的。很多人都劝我放弃，但他在我心里还是留了一个无可取代的位子。人的心，很复杂，有时叫你放弃，有时叫你坚持，有时叫你忍耐。。。所以，我真的不懂我的心，唯一知道的是，我还爱他。天啊。。。那几时才可以才可以有个结局？？

昨晚，当我你告诉我时，还真的。。。有够。。难受。。。
明明是我想知道的但又最害怕知道的。。。做人真矛盾。。。

下一步，我该怎么办呢？

失败

对，又到了我心情不太好的时候。。
很难过，因为考试考不好。
有的人会想，其实也没什么大不了，但对我而言的确是很重要。
我很失望，很不开心，因为我觉得我辜负了那辛苦为了赚钱养家的父母。
爸，妈，真的很对不起。我答应，不会再有下一次。
其实，刚看到成绩的时候整个人都崩溃了。。眼泪也不由自主地掉下来。。很失败吧？
对，我就是那么的懦弱。又怎样？我也是人嘛。。
很勤兴的是，原来身边还有很多朋友的支持和关心。。很高兴有你们在我身边。。

我很努力地安慰自己，和自己说，失败其实也没什么大不了的啊。。只能再爬起来也是一个新的开始。记得。爸爸曾经告诉过我，如果你从一开始就想着失败，那就注定会失败。想了一想，真的有点道理。重点是，不要让恐惧打败自己。他讲得也对，失败了可以再来。都活了二十年了，酱简单的道理也因该要接受和明白吧。

好，再次的机会只好把握，决不放弃，否则就对不起自己。

今天的心情真差！！




明天会更好吧？

Humans are meant to be selfish?

Told cha I will update my blog from now
and, yes.
I'm here again.

Guess what?
I'm posting this in the campus's library now.
Sigh.
My final exam is next week and I feel my brain still stuck with grass instead of what I have read.
How? =(
This is the first time my tears kept dropping when I was doing my management accounting.arghhhh!!! wth wrong with me ahh??

idk la.
Lets count down til my finals say bye-bye to me.
urmmmm...
8 days?

yaya...1 week and 1 freaking day. =)

God, please please please bless me


.............................................................

Okay, I guess I should stop my craps and back to the books.

=(

Confused

Another post of the day.
Hrmmmm...I feel like blogging today.Idk why.
Nvm, perhaps I'm just so stressed out with the mountain of chapters which I haven touch yet.
How???





Study lorh
...............



But why I'm still slacking here?
hrmmmmmm....

爱和恨难道就是在那一线之差吗？
我很害怕。。。。
再回到那一直期待你会回头看我的时候，
因为，我不想再等待。
等待，真的很漫长，很无奈。。
因为没有期限的等待真的很傻！

也许，我还爱着你的那么一点点。。
就一点点。

不想再回头看到自己的愚蠢，
前面，还有一道引向你前进的一道光。

Hahahahaha....

I'm just so lame. =)

Back. 2 July 2010

OmahhhhhhgoDDDDD!!
I've left my blog since March?? wtfbbq =P
And now, I am back =)
The reason why I am back is actually no reason. It is just due to my lameness..ehhermm...
and of course I felt so sorry with my poor little bloggie. *sobsob
Okay, from now onwards,I promise to update when I'm free kay??
Ahhhhahhahahhaha....
Serious larhh...I will post something when I'm really free!






My finals are coming
.......
Free??
errrr....


I will still blog something! ahahaah..
at least...something rite?


It's been so long since I din blog,
ehhermm...but my life is going on as usual.
Tho there's happenings out there...but, it's already a past tense rite?
Everyone will have to move on and move on...move until the day that u have to sit on the wheel chair larh i guess???
I'm so sorry, please forgive my fai-ness

Time flies, and everything changed. People? Place?Me?
ermm...I got no idea actually.
But I'm glad that those who are always here for me are still here for me =))
Thankyouuuuuuuuu!!!!
But....for those who should get lost in my life had just gone.
ahahahaha...
and those who suppose to be here had just flied!!!
if you're get to read this,
Please please stay alive til you back to M'sia please....
You're a strong plant ? rite??


==''


Okay, it's time to open my IMA book. =(

buhbey!



Lastly, Happie birthday KAR YAN!
Have a blast =)

Only heaven knows

Time flies,
It's march now but what happened in the past is still fresh in my mind.
I missed grandpa. Whenever I thought of him, my tears rushing out without my control. I can always remember scene by scene, the night he left us,how I used to hug my family tightly, the days when he's admitting to hospital,lying on the bed struggling and trying to breath so hard just to stay here with us. And now you left us with lots and lots of memory. If he's still here, I promise and swear that I will spend more time with him, I wanna talk to him,I wanna let him knows that I care about him....but everything is too late. I know regretting is meaningless but I did. Whenever I saw people's grandpa, I wish that he's still with us...he made me feel proud because he is the best Ah gong i ever had, the great man in my entire life

You're always in my heart

I Love you, gong gong =D

Been here all along so why can't you see?

Happy CNY!

+
Happy belated valentine!
(you can just ignore it if you're single cause it's kinda meaningless to me too.LoLx!)

How's your Chinese New Year so far? mine was great =D
But what we did more or less was da same rite?
gambling,visiting,gathering,drinking,gossiping, movie?ktv? i missed da two actually cause da cinemas and green box in seremban was SO FULL!

Anyways, I enjoyed alot during cny.The most precious moment is, when you get to be with da family&friends. Although there's still some emo-ing time, but who cares? life is like that. I'll just try my best to ignore. :) This new year was really great for me i guess? I gain what I lost.happy rite?yes, I really appreciate to meet those who's long lost in my life and they come back again. =D thanks.
Hope 2010 will be a great year for me?

i'm still waiting for the last bottle to come.
bb.